Thursday, October 4, 2007

Dive on In

I think I'm going to take the plunge. I was afraid to do it. But I think I'm going to do it. I don't want to say what it is, because frankly, it's none of your business. Just know that something I was afraid to do is going to be done. I think.

Now that that's out of the way...listen to me rant for a while. I've always been a looker, never a leaper. I mean, sometimes I'd leap, but not without a long, extensive look first. Because of this, I feel that I've missed out on a few important life experiences. In the past family members and ex boyfriends have kept me grounded...too grounded. I want to have fun. I want to make mistakes. I want to do something that has a huge risk factor, but could possibly have amazing rewards!

I know that my family loves me and cares for me and wants nothing but the best, but I've got to do my own thing now.

I'm reading Eat Pray Love. That book is changing my life already. I'm only on chapter 23, out of 106. There a picture described in it and I'm trying to recreate it myself. I got pretty close to getting it done during creative writing. But I need to draw it in my sketchbook, not on notebook paper.

Basically, Eat Pray Love has taught me that I'm young, I'm free. I'm freer than I've ever been and ever will be. And it's taught me to not be afraid. I can't be scared all the time. I can't go through life being afraid of what may or may not happen. I'm not saying that I should live without abandon, but I need to live. I'm tired of not feeling anything but desire or emptiness.

This all ties in with me taking the plunge.

We decorated the wall behind our table the other day. I love it! It looks great. The nice thing is that we can change out the pictures in the frames. I want to do one with us in our prom dresses. Because I think I looked damn good in my dress, tiny boobs and all. I actually think I've looked great in every single formal dress I've bought. It may sound conceited to say that, but I'm serious! I'm proud of my taste in formal dress attire. Maybe you'll see a collection of the pictures somday. Probably not because they aren't on digital camera.

OOH!!! I did something remarkable today! I deleted the numbers of the most poisonous person in my life. I deleted them from my life. I've felt very good today. I think it's because of that.

I have a passion for frozen grapes. I really like them. I'm mostly saying that because I don't want to stop typing this entry, but I'm running out of things to say.


Angie said...

Oh come on, you have to tell me. I'll tell you what my son did at the park today. Well, I will blog it after he goes to bed so feel free to read it. I promise it was slightly embarassing. Okay you don't have to tell me...I'll live.

Carrisa said...

Congrats on taking your plunge!

Found you through whoorl and because I noticed you were a fellow Oklahoman, I had to come check you out.

Good luck!